Jab’s Builds! (Beaker! Sam Eagle! Miss Piggy! The Swedish Chef!)

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Jabroniville
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Robin (Damian Wayne)

Post by Jabroniville »

Image
Image

ROBIN VI (Damian Wayne/Ibn al Xu'fassch)
Created By:
Grant Morrison & Andy Kubert
First Appearance: Batman #657 (Nov. 2006)
Role: The Sidekick, Asshole Kid
Group Affiliations: The Teen Titans
PL 8 (155)
STRENGTH
2 STAMINA 3 AGILITY 6
FIGHTING 13 DEXTERITY 5
INTELLIGENCE 4 AWARENESS 3 PRESENCE 0

Skills:
Acrobatics 8 (+14)
Athletics 9 (+11)
Deception 10 (+10)
Expertise (Streetwise) 2 (+6)
Expertise (Science) 3 (+7)
Expertise (Business) 5 (+9)
Insight 2 (+5)
Investigation 4 (+7)
Perception 5 (+8)
Ranged Combat (Batarangs) 5 (+13)
Stealth 5 (+11)
Technology 8 (+12)
Vehicles 4 (+9)

Advantages:
Accurate Attack, Agile Feint, Beginner's Luck, Defensive Attack, Equipment 12 (Staff +2, Bat-cycle, Utility Belt), Evasion, Fast Grab, Grappling Finesse, Improved Critical (Unarmed), Improved Critical (Staff), Improved Defense, Improved Disarm, Improved Initiative, Improved Smash, Improved Trip, Languages 1 (Various), Power Attack, Precise Attack (Close/Concealment), Ranged Attack 4, Skill Mastery (Acrobatics), Takedown, Tracking, Uncanny Dodge

Equipment:
"Bat-cycle" Motorcycle (Medium, Strenght 1, Speed 6- 120 mph, Defense 10, Toughness 8, Remote Control (11)

"Utility Belt"
Camera, CommLink, Audio Recorder, Handcuffs, Binoculars, Mini-Tracer, Night Vision Goggles, Flashlight, Gas Mask, Multi-Tool, Rebreather, Cutting Torch (12)
"Grapple Gun" Movement 1 (Swinging) (2)

"Choking Gas" Affliction 6 (Fort; Dazed & Vulnerable/Defenseless & Stunned/Incapacitated) (Extras: Area- 30ft. Cloud +2, Ranged, Extra Condition) (Diminished Range -1) (29) -- (32)
  • AE: "Batarangs" Blast 3 (Feats: Homing, Ricochet) (Extras: Multiattack) (Diminished Range -1) (10)
  • AE: "Smoke Pellets" Concealment (Visuals) 2 (Extras: Attack, Area- 30ft. Cloud +2) (10)
-- (57 points)

Offense:
Unarmed +13 (+2 Damage, DC 17)
Staff +12 (+4 Damage, DC 19)
Batarangs +13 (+3 Damage, DC 18)
Choking Gas +6 Area (+6 Affliction, DC 16)
Initiative +9

Defenses:
Dodge +13 (DC 23), Parry +13 (DC 23), Toughness +3, Fortitude +5, Will +6

Complications:
Relationship (Batman & Talia)- Damian is the son of Bruce Wayne and Talia al Ghul.
Enemy (The Joker, The Pengiun, etc.)- All of Batman's Rogues also want The Boy Wonder dead.
Reputation (Ass)- Every other superhero alive dislikes and mistrusts Damian, finding him at-best humorously annoying.

Total: Abilities: 72 / Skills: 70--35 / Advantages: 37 / Powers: 0 / Defenses: 11 (155)

-UGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH I thought I already DID a bio for this character! I didn't think I was going to have to write a whole NEW one! At least it's not as bad as writing unneeded new bios for both Black Brigade and Michael Pointer, but still- LAME.

-Damian Wayne is the controversial "Creators Pet" character of Grant Morrison, based off an old tryst Batman had with Talia al Ghul way, way back in a 1987 Batman: Son of the Demon story that was all "HOLY SHIT BAT-BABY!" but was largely treated like it may or may not have counted- other stories would also use him in "Elseworlds" tales, like Kingdom Come (where he's a handsome behind-the-scenes manipulator who later hooks up with Dick & Starfire's daughter Nightstar). Instead, Morrison decided that the little boy WAS Batman's son, and grew up as kind of an arrogant, entitled ass, trained by the Leauge of Assassins. This makes Damian the FIFTH in-canon Robin (sixth, if you count Earth-Two's Golden Age Robin), which is in and of itself controversial, as it seems ludicrous to have so many.

-Damian was initially originated as a rape-baby, but Morrison kept changing his mind (initially it was a caonical research error on his part, assuming that Talia had drugged Bruce and jumped his bones; but he'd flip-flop over it)- finally they revealed that it was consensual, and Bruce just regretted it. He finally became the proper Robin when DICK took the cowl of Batman, when Bruce was thought-dead, as I guess they wanted something even MORE different while Bruce was gone, and Tim was busy being upgraded to "Red Robin".

-The kid is eager and tries hard, but is a giant, arrogant ass, and is treated as such by nearly every character, most of whom spend their time lecturing, rolling their eyes, or yelling at him. This produces some pretty funny comics in the few appearances I've read of the kid- while it seems that many/most long-time Bat-readers hate him, I've found him a bit amusing, in that he produces all these conflicts and is constantly screamed at. His wild, over-the-top arrogance and insistence on "murder first" is silly, but funny. And... it's important that characters like this actually GET THEIR COMEUPPANCE. This is something that Marv "Danny Chase" Wolfman never understood, and a few other writers have done by accident as well- while Damian's an ass, he's TREATED like an ass, and his appearances are chock FULL of his failures- he bombs out on missions, frequently needs saving, and Tim Drake once beat seven shades of piss out of him for needling him over not being chosen as the new Robin.

-Damian continues on as Robin, joining the Teen Titans for a brief spell (Dick felt that Damian needed superhero friends, and that being part of a team would be good for him)- he quits when Tim Drake re-joins them. Since Grant Morrison had the pull to refuse the Enforced Reboot of DC's "New 52", his Pet Character thus was saved from changing at all. After another year or so, Damian actually dies- killed by an adult-aged clone of him called The Heretic. Thus Morrison writes a bunch of stories about how this affects Bruce and the others, even though there's been like two Robin deaths that "shattered Batman" already... and Damian returns the VERY NEXT YEAR anyhow. Damian is resurrected with a "Cosmic Shard" Macguffin, after Bruce is given the option to save either Damian or his parents. Which, to be fair, seems like a pretty good "Sophie's Choice" kind of a thing, though this seems like it's an entire year's worth of stories to get to that point.

-"DC Rebirth" featured him leading his own version of the Teen Titans, as well as teaming up with the son of Superman in the Super Sons book.

-Damian stats up pretty much like the PL 8 Tim Drake Robin did, minus some Presence (because he's more disagreeable than your everyday internet forum poster), but with more book-smarts (he's a good enough engineer to complete designs on a flying Batmobile that befuddled Bruce), and a bit more viciousness in his "play style", including being trained in more styles of weapons (so a higher base Fighting score).
Last edited by Jabroniville on Mon Jun 27, 2022 3:40 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Ares
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Miss Martian! Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street!)

Post by Ares »

It's funny how one of the complaints I've heard from Dan DiDio about Nightwing was that him being in his 20's "ages up Batman", requiring Batman to be X-years old (I tend to picture experienced heroes like Bruce and Clark as being in their early-to-mid 30's). Joe Q had a similar complaint about Peter Parker's marriage. But Damian Wayne is far, far worse for "aging" Bruce, especially if they ever decide to start making Damian a teenager rather than the 10-to-12 year old he's usually portrayed as. I mean, think about it. The incident with Talia happened after Bruce was an experienced Batman, meaning something like 5-to-8 years into his career. Then allow for 10-to-12 years for Damian. Assuming Bruce started out fighting crime in his mid-twenties, Damian basically turns Bruce into someone in his early-to-mid 40s, possibly even pushing 50.

I don't dislike the idea of Damian per-say, but he strikes me as someone who should be one of those "near future" stories, kind of like May "Mayday" Parker's Spider-Girl. Maybe its just nostalgia, but to me, the set up where you had Dick as the hero who had come into his own, Jason as the failure who was still dead and Tim as the current Robin doing right by the legacy was pretty much perfect. Barbara could work as either Batgirl or Oracle in that set up.

I will say it was kind of amusing when Dick was Bruce, because it reversed the usual Batman and Robin dynamic where now Batman is the one being funny and making jokes and Robin is the super serious, grim one.
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street! Damian Wayne!)

Post by greycrusader »

DC's timeline is an absolute mess, owing to the numerous reboots and the selective aging of various legacy heroes, but Batman and Green Lantern got hit REALLY hard, especially with the whole "52" reboot-Bruce started out as Batman in his very early twenties, but has had FIVE sidekicks who started out between 12-16 years of age, with THREE of them now either in their early twenties (Dick, Jason-maybe) or nearly so (Tim and maybe Jason), while there have been three Earth-based GLs who came AFTER Hal (who was an air force pilot, remember), all of whom had lengthy solo careers (though there was overlap between several of them). Yet both Batman and GL are supposed to be no older than 30-35 years of age. That...really doesn't work, even by comic book logic.

(And of course, all of Barbara Gordon's adventures have to now fit in an eighteen month span prior to her temporary wheelchair confinement, though somehow Cassandra Cain's turn as Batgirl is still in continuity.)

Maybe the whole Duela Dent thing wasn't so outlandish in the end.

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Some Guys

Post by Jabroniville »

THESE RANDOM ASSHOLES:
-These guys are utter one-off jobbers, appearing in a 1983 New Teen Titans Annual, featuring the death of the family of District Attorney Adrian Chase- Chase, who was on the trail of a big-time Mafia Underboss, gets his apartment blown up as a result. The Underboss is chided by a nasty old Mafia Granny (yes, very much like Ma Gnucci, as Greycrusader points out), because Mafia vets in the States know you do NOT attack the cops & law officials if you know what's good for you- it creates bad press and justifies a nasty counterattack. This "Donna Omicidio" demands that Scarapelli hand over his "files" for investigation, which he understands is a death sentence. And so he makes a deal with The Monitor (back when Wolfman was hinting at this mysterious arbiter of super-villain hardware & mercenary activity, anticipating his use in Crisis on Infinite Earths), and gets a band of mercenaries brought in.

-The guys are given quick little half-pages of introduction, dealing with a victim and then being contacted by the Monitor for another job- combined, they assault the Teen Titans as one, nearly killing the team in a surprise attack (Bazooka fires on Cyborg and creates a huge explosion, while Scorcher sets fire to the entire warehouse). However, a combination of the Titans' skills and the intervention of Chase in his new identity- a Punisher knock-off named Vigilante- save their lives. Kid Flash easily takes out Spear, while Donna overpowers Tanker's powersuit. Slasher and Scorcher, however, are done in by Vigilante's weapons (Slasher is shot in the head; Scorcher KO'd and possibly dead by bludgeoning). Bazooka is stopped when Cyborg blocks his bazooka with his HAND. Only Cheshire fights another day- she escapes after poisoning Kid Flash- Raven is required to save Wally's life.

-Cheshire would go on to become a much bigger threat later on- this is merely her debut (we're clearly meant to find her a bigger deal than the others, who wear the plain costumes of "people who don't matter"). Vigilante confronts Scarapelli in his home, with an intense Robin disallowing Chase to murder the mobster, no matter how evil he is. But Scarapelli turns a gun on the two, shooting Robin and being gunned down by Chase. We would never see any villain but Cheshire again.
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Re: Some Guys

Post by Jack of Spades »

Jabroniville wrote: Thu Feb 14, 2019 2:14 am THESE RANDOM ASSHOLES:
Best team name ever!
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street! Damian Wayne!)

Post by kirinke »

I am so stealing that name in one of the games I'm playing in.
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Spear

Post by Jabroniville »

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SPEAR (Real Name Unknown)
Created By:
Marv Wolfman & George Perez
First Appearance: The New Teen Titans Annual #2 (1983)
Role: Jobber Villain, One-Off Foe
Group Affiliations: None
PL 7 (78)
STRENGTH
3 STAMINA 3 AGILITY 4
FIGHTING 6 DEXTERITY 4
INTELLIGENCE 2 AWARENESS 2 PRESENCE 2

Skills:
Athletics 4 (+6)
Close Combat (Spear) 2 (+8)
Deception 3 (+5)
Expertise (Criminal) 3 (+5)
Insight 2 (+4)
Intimidation 3 (+5)
Perception 3 (+5)
Technology 2 (+4)

Advantages:
Equipment 2 (Spear +2- Reach, Javelin- Strength-Damage +2- Ranged 5), Ranged Attack 4

Offense:
Unarmed +6 (+3 Damage, DC 18)
Spear +8 (+5 Damage, DC 20)
Javelin +8 (+5 Ranged Damage, DC 20)
Initiative +4

Defenses:
Dodge +9 (DC 19), Parry +8 (DC 18), Toughness +3, Fortitude +5, Will +4

Complications:
Motivation (Greed)

Total: Abilities: 52 / Skills: 22--11 / Advantages: 6 / Powers: 0 / Defenses: 9 (78)

-An African guy who throws spears (oh, dear... wonder why THIS guy never showed up again?- though Bazooka makes the racist joke by calling it out). He's shown to be EXCEPTIONALLY large, but all he manages to do is nearly tag a stunned Kid Flash (whose difficulty in being tagged is probably why Wolfman believed his powers were "unwieldly" in a team book), and Wally is shown uppercutting him to unconsciousness in his very next panel. Like, his ENTIRE APPEARANCE in the fight takes place over two panels- he throws a spear, then he's knocked out.
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street! Damian Wayne!)

Post by Ares »

Jack of Spades wrote: Thu Feb 14, 2019 3:18 am
Jabroniville wrote: Thu Feb 14, 2019 2:14 am THESE RANDOM ASSHOLES:
Best team name ever!
kirinke wrote: Thu Feb 14, 2019 3:29 am I am so stealing that name in one of the games I'm playing in.
Ditto.
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street! Damian Wayne!)

Post by KorokoMystia »

And yet these assholes, and those idiots from Northstar's book probably had more panel time combined than THESE utter losers: THE GRIP! I might even go as far as to call them one of the absolute worst jobber villain teams in Marvel history. Sadly, statting them would go into "Blind Build" territory as they only appear in TWO PAGES total and we don't get any proper descriptions or even visual showings of what their bargain-basement powersuits can do, for the most part. (for some, it's obvious because of their names and their weapons are clearly visible, but the others, not so much)
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Miss Martian! Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street!)

Post by Ken »

Jabroniville wrote: Thu Feb 14, 2019 12:32 am ROBIN VI (Damian Wayne/Ibn al Xu'fassch)
Created By:
Grant Morrison & Andy Kubert

-Damian Wayne is the controversial "Creators Pet" character of Grant Morrison, based off an old tryst Batman had with Talia al Ghul way, way back in a 1987 Batman: Son of the Demon story that was all "HOLY SHIT BAT-BABY!" but was largely treated like it may or may not have counted- other stories would also use him in "Elseworlds" tales, like Kingdom Come (where he's a handsome behind-the-scenes manipulator who later hooks up with Dick & Starfire's daughter Nightstar).

-Damian was initially originated as a rape-baby, but Morrison kept changing his mind (initially it was a caonical research error on his part, assuming that Talia had drugged Bruce and jumped his bones; but he'd flip-flop over it)- finally they revealed that it was consensual, and Bruce just regretted it. He finally became the proper Robin when DICK took the cowl of Batman, when Bruce was thought-dead, as I guess they wanted something even MORE different while Bruce was gone, and Tim was busy being upgraded to "Red Robin".
Ares wrote: Thu Feb 14, 2019 12:47 am I don't dislike the idea of Damian per-say, but he strikes me as someone who should be one of those "near future" stories, kind of like May "Mayday" Parker's Spider-Girl. Maybe its just nostalgia,
Nostalgia is EXACTLY what Damien was. Starting 1960, there was a sporadic series of stories about the "Second Batman and Robin team". They were explicitly "Near Future" stories, and they were fictions written by Alfred. Tales of Dick Grayson as Batman II, and Bruce Wayne Jr. as Robin II.

Morrison wasn't trying to do something new with Batman and Robin while Bruce was gone. He was doing something old.

There is a significant portion of Batman lore from the last few years before the Bat-books were handed to Julius Schwartz to edit that DC has largely tried to ignore: the time-travel and science fiction stories; the alternate future stories. Even Kathy and Betty Kane as Batwoman and Bat-Girl were all but forgotten. Then... all of a sudden in 2006, it was being brought back and reinvented.

A semi-new Katherine Kane (now using Kate instead of Kathy) was Batwoman again. It was established that she and Flamebird (Bette Kane) are related. The League of Heroes was brought back. The Batman of Zur-En-Arrh was even worked in.

When Batman was "killed" in Final Crisis, DC tried to pretend that there was this Battle of for the Cowl. It was crap. It was a foregone conclusion, at least to anyone who knew enough Bat-history to see what Morrison and company were doing. I knew with absolute certainty that Dick was going to be "Batman II", and the then-recently "re-introduced" Damian Wayne was going to be "Robin II". Morrison was on this huge kick to bring back Batman's weirdest shit, and he was allowed to do it.

In Batman: Son of the Demon (it was a graphic novel, so easy to ignore in-continuity), the Bruce-and-Talia sex was clearly consensual. But it also ended with the baby being put up for adoption, outside of Bruce's and Ra's' worlds.

Although I still remember one commenter mentioning (essentially) that Batman has ... Batarangs, Bat-ropes, Bat gas-pellets, Bat-rebreather, Bat-bombs, the Bat-shield, Bat shark repellent, the Bat alphabet soup container and God knows what else; but no Bat-prophylactics. Really?

The Damian-as-rape-Batbaby would make more narrative sense. I still, personally, would prefer if Damian had simply been a sticky mess inside a Bat-condom.

But... it's the Radium Age. What can you do?
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street! Damian Wayne!)

Post by Ares »

KorokoMystia wrote: Thu Feb 14, 2019 3:56 am And yet these assholes, and those idiots from Northstar's book probably had more panel time combined than THESE utter losers: THE GRIP! I might even go as far as to call them one of the absolute worst jobber villain teams in Marvel history. Sadly, statting them would go into "Blind Build" territory as they only appear in TWO PAGES total and we don't get any proper descriptions or even visual showings of what their bargain-basement powersuits can do, for the most part. (for some, it's obvious because of their names and their weapons are clearly visible, but the others, not so much)
Now hold on a minute, I might just be grasping at straws here, but I don't think we should just dismiss these guys out of hand. A lot of little used characters often struggle to clutch onto any relevance, and I'm always a fan of embracing lesser known heroes and villains, give them a chance to get some purchase in the modern age. Maybe they'll catch on, and it's always handy to have a group of jobbers the heroes can grapple with.
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street! Damian Wayne!)

Post by KorokoMystia »

Somehow hand puns seem to be a recurring thing on this thread. :)
But yeah, in seriousness, I love dumb jobbers, though those guys really got the short end of the stick. Most jobbers at least get to show off what they can do (hell, even a description of their powers) before getting beaten up. I guess it's because it was only one of multiple stories in that issue. And some pretty well forgotten villains have made a resurgance lately. I mean, even the Externals of all people made a return not too long ago.

As for these random mercs, I do rather like how each one gets their own introduction to establish their character. Presumably they didn't survive the fight, which is kind of a shame. I do think stuff like "Backgrounder In The Hood's Army" devalues jobbers, though on the other hand...A single Jobber ain't going to cause much trouble for most established heroes, but a big group of them? Now that's more of a threat.
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street! Damian Wayne!)

Post by Ares »

KorokoMystia wrote: Thu Feb 14, 2019 5:26 am Somehow hand puns seem to be a recurring thing on this thread. :)
Are you saying that these puns are . . . . .


Image


. . . . . getting out of hand?


Image
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Bazooka

Post by Jabroniville »

Image

Jesus Christ it even has white writing on it.

BAZOOKA (Joseph something)
Created By:
Marv Wolfman & George Perez
First Appearance: The New Teen Titans Annual #2 (1983)
Role: Jobber Villain, One-Off Foe
Group Affiliations: None
PL 7 (75)
STRENGTH
2 STAMINA 3 AGILITY 4
FIGHTING 6 DEXTERITY 4
INTELLIGENCE 2 AWARENESS 2 PRESENCE 2

Skills:
Athletics 4 (+6)
Deception 3 (+5)
Expertise (Criminal) 3 (+5)
Insight 2 (+4)
Intimidation 3 (+5)
Perception 3 (+5)
Technology 2 (+4)

Advantages:
Equipment 4 (Modified Bazooka- Blast 8), Ranged Attack 2

Offense:
Unarmed +6 (+2 Damage, DC 17)
Bazooka +6 (+8 Ranged Damage, DC 23)
Initiative +4

Defenses:
Dodge +9 (DC 19), Parry +8 (DC 18), Toughness +3, Fortitude +5, Will +4

Complications:
Motivation (Greed)
Hatred (Non-Whites)- Bazooka is a redneck racist.

Total: Abilities: 50 / Skills: 20--10 / Advantages: 6 / Powers: 0 / Defenses: 9 (75)

-Bazooka is a racist redneck who loves guns and wears a red hat with white writing on it, which of course today comes off as antagonistic political commentary, but back then was just a random accepted "hillbilly" design. Bazooka taunts Spear as a "spearchucker", then talks about Cyborg as a "colored boy", which pisses off Donna, but she ends up tangling with Tanker before she can do anything. Bazooka's blast is what knocks the Teen Titans for a loop and puts them on the defensive (Vic loses a leg to the explosion, having taken the brunt of it), and Scorcher's flames keep them there. Bazooka gets too close when attempting a coup de grace, however, and Vic puts his hand in front of Bazooka's weapon as it fires. We don't see the after-effects, however- the fight is wrapped up a couple pages later, and then we're at Titans Tower, and Vic looks just fine. PRESUMABLY Vic didn't just kill a man, as that was a thing the book rarely glossed over, but... that was point-blank.
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Re: Jab’s Builds (Static! Kid Devil! Kid Eternity! Danny the Street! Damian Wayne!)

Post by Ares »

So getting hit with a bazooka missile at range will completely blow off one of Cyborg's legs, but sticking his hand in the bazooka and taking the blast point blank leaves Vic unharmed and takes out the bad guy?

I know DC is owned by Warner Bros, but I didn't realize actual Looney Toons physics worked.
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